New Jersey: 1 Rhode Island: Infinity

I dislike New Jersey. I hate that my niece and nephew live there. Only people from New Jersey don't hate New Jersey. Everyone else knows that it's a cultural craphole. It therefore should come as a small surprise that the show Jersey Shore on MTV has taken a hold of me, like millions of others.

I don't claim it's my 'guilty pleasure'. I shouldn't have to feel ashamed that I watch guidos act like guidos. It's like feeling guilty for going to temple on Yom Kippur. If anything, the show should expunge me of all guilt.

But more importantly, I feel at home while watching the show. You take Paulie D (from Rhode Island represent!), throw in a good amount of Vinny, and you have my high school US History teacher Mr. Ed Dirizzo.

So yeah, the show reminds me of Rhode-I-land, which has a large place in my heart. And that's part of the appeal for me. Big whoop, wannafightaboutit?

"My hair didn't even move an inch and I was in and out of the water. My hair's windproof, waterproof, soccerproof, motocycleproof. I'm not sure if my hair's bulletproof, I'm not willin' to try that." - Paulie D, my new DJ Hero ( or is it DJ-hero?)

-Charles