Sunday, December 20, 2009

Day 1 - Atira turns 4/Let it Snow!

The first day ended like any other. My mother: "The light in the bathroom (of the hotel) doesn't work!" (paused for a second) "Oh wait, there it goes."

This blog will be short and sweet - like the little Korean dude in line in front of us at a 24 hour Walmart in hickland Maryland. It will last from Dec 21 until Jan 3rd, and let me just warn you that there will be wonderful (and sometimes terrible) quotes abound. So enjoy!

(Photo Above) Awkward and stereotypical Wawa photo of brother and mother

My niece's 4th birthday party was postponed because everyone in New Jersey is a pansy. Yes, they are. No, I wont fight you about it.

So I could not complete my two goals of the day. 1) Kick my brother's ass in some Jew-on-Jew karate in front of his 4 year old niece, forever scarring her and forcing her to remember that Uncle Ari is a drunk and weak degenerate...2) Take an informal poll and find out for one of my coworkers if Jews do karate more than any other non-Asian peoples.

We stopped at several seedy motels for the night before choosing a decent one. One of them "smelled musty" as my mother elegantly put it, and at another she thought they were offering 2 rooms for $18, hookers an extra $2. It was $80 and not worth it. Our goal is to keep the bar at $9/a room for the rest of the vacation.

After Day 1, location is the outskirts of northern Maryland.


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